Sometimes boredom in sobriety looks like not wanting to be around anyone. We want to isolate and sit with our feelings. If you quit drinking and experience any new or worsening mental health symptoms, please consider https://makeandmeaning.com/MediationPractices/different-practice-of-meditation therapy. Acute anxiety and depression from the withdrawal process can ease within a few days to a week. But for many people, lingering feelings of anxiety, depression, and general malaise can last weeks, months, or even longer.
- On the weekend, we went to bars and clubs.
- Drinking and getting high was a lot more fun.
- It’s going to be tough at first, but what isn’t?
- Sobriety can feel like a punishment for many people.
- Fortunately, there are more ways than ever to connect with like-minded people who are fellow travelers on this path.
Accept that you are in a transitional phase, which will take time.
So if all of your friends drink alongside you, then there’s no issue, right? Well, there’s a concept in psychology known as “confirmation bias,” and it https://www.digital-photo-lab.com/Reviews/plenipotentiary-camera means that we often look for evidence to support something that we already believe to be true. This year, I celebrated five years sober. It’s been over six years since I first started seriously questioning my relationship with alcohol and considered a life without it. That’s six hard, beautiful, glorious years during which I not only stopped drinking, but also finally moved on from all recreational drugs as well as a history of bulimia. As you get going, keep a simple chart or use an app that tracks your progress.
However, when it has happened, I have to speak up to point out that I didn’t drink and I’m not subsidizing their drinking. If you’re like me, this can feel entirely terrifying. I have always hated the feeling that I’m putting people out or being difficult. Before I quit drinking, I never really used to care about dividing the bill down the middle with a group.
You Hate Being Sober When You Have To Create A New Lifestyle
I over-identified with every negative feeling in my body. Start with going for walks for minutes every day. Pursue outdoor activities like kayaking or fishing. We are stressed-out, overstimulated, https://advicepsychic.net/2015/03/17/when-its-time-to-get-help/ tech-obsessed creatures. Pile on some sobriety struggle, and it’s a recipe for madness. If you have a willing friend or family member, take them along.
Things That Inevitably Happen to Your Personal Life When You Get Sober
Don’t get down on yourself because you can’t get wasted at the bar with your friends anymore. You don’t want to fall down that rabbit hole. Sometimes we would watch a show, but even that become untenable for me after a couple of drinks because I did not have the attention span for it. This is important to remember when thinking about boredom. In fact, when you first quit, it feels like everyone in the world is out getting drunk but you. Instead, buck up and remember what’s in your control.
Build a strong support network.
- My second dog, the Yulin rescue, was a project because of his separation anxiety.
- Get coffee with a friend to take your mind off relationship problems.
- I was emotional, without my recovery lifestyle, and worse, without sleep.
- She described some longtime members as “seething cauldrons of anger.” Another commenter observed that many AA members are caught in a cycle of negativity.
- Fried and overly sugary foods will also artificially spike your dopamine levels and cause your brain to overcorrect, leaving you feeling irritable, depressed, and cranky.
When you begin to view your negative thoughts and feelings as problems to be solved rather than the embodiment of who you actually are, you liberate yourself. When I was finished, it was like someone had hit the refresh button on my brain. I could go back and re-read what I wrote and approach it from the perspective of an outside observer. It also opens up space to approach your internal world differently.
It will hurt (pretty bad at first), but in time you will come to see it as the gift it is—and you won’t waste time getting to know the wrong person. That being said, you might not be at a place where you want people to know you’re not drinking, and that’s OK. You can provide an excuse, like that you’re on antibiotics, or you aren’t feeling great or want to feel fresh for something you have going on the next day.
- I’ve been where you are, as have thousands of other sober people who had to learn to have a life again after sobriety.
- I’d bet nine out of 10 of us won’t even answer, and we’ll just laugh because it’s such a ridiculous question.
- Drunk me didn’t have to worry if I was alone at a party because drunk me didn’t abide such things.
- Serotonin depletion can cause major mood swings and feelings of sadness, anxiety, and irritability.
- Not only because not drinking is hard, but also because we live in a society where most everyone around us drinks.
Alcohol didn’t make life fun. It just made you not care.
It’s an invitation to stop playing small. It’s an opportunity to grow into your bones, and every single crap thing that happens to you on the way only makes you stronger. While making the decision to be sober was the best thing I’ve ever done, it’s also one of the hardest. Not only because not drinking is hard, but also because we live in a society where most everyone around us drinks. It means continually checking in with yourself, continually reaching out to new people who may have ideas you haven’t tried before, and continually asking questions that will help you improve your life.
Drunk me didn’t worry if she belonged, or said the right thing, or had to have small talk because drunk me just handled that. If people press that response, I’ll either stare at them and hold an uncomfortable silence (this is enjoyable at some point), or just change the subject. There are exceptions to this, like if someone alludes to their own struggle with alcohol, and then I might offer up a bit more of my personal experience.
Fried and overly sugary foods will also artificially spike your dopamine levels and cause your brain to overcorrect, leaving you feeling irritable, depressed, and cranky. These are all things you’re trying to overcome from drinking. Volunteering is a great way to reconnect with your community. Helping others actually boosts our own mental health and feelings of self-worth. Plus, it helps us with our emotional sobriety and wellness. On the one hand, you have no idea what you’re supposed to do with yourself.
